I don’t know about you, but I love it when my partner talks dirty to me during sex. It’s a huge turn-on for me, and it seems to make the whole experience even more enjoyable for both of us. That’s why I was so perplexed when I had a partner who only ever really got vocal when they were about to orgasm. I would think to myself… is there something wrong with me? Am I doing something wrong? Why are they only vocal when they orgasm?

Here are several potential explanations for why your partner is only vocal when they orgasm, and some ideas to play with.

1. They get lost in the moment and forget to talk dirty to you, because they are focused on pleasing you and don’t want to get distracted or ruin the flow. Sex isn’t meant to be serious, it should be fun with laughter and random shit that makes sparks fly. Breathe and relax…

2. They’re nervous about talking dirty and only feel comfortable doing it when they’re about to cum. Open up the conversation in terms of the kind of words that turn you on and get you going! Don’t be ashamed or shy about this and say what’s on your mind. For example, words like bitch, slut and so on during intimacy doesn’t make you a bad person. We all like what we like.

3. They think that talking dirty is only appropriate during the climax of sex. Bring the power of dirty talking outside of the bedroom. Whether it be text messages, voice notes, sneaky calls during the day when you are at work or on a lunch break. Basically, mix it up!

4. They know that you love it when they talk dirty and get turned on by the fact that they can make you cum just by using words at that moment. This is understandable, but it’s also a two-way street and cumming together can be absolutely incredible so why wait?

5. They have a hard time thinking of things to say during sex, but orgasming gives them the opportunity to say whatever comes to mind without feeling self-conscious about it. This goes back to point two, share the words you like.

6. Their orgasms are always more intense when they talk dirty to you, so they do that in the moment to maximise their own pleasure. Make sure your pleasure is being maximised too! Communication is everything.

7. They want you to feel appreciated and loved, so they save all of their compliments for when they’ll have the most impact—during their orgasm. This is a beautiful thing so embrace all of the compliments that come your way, but if you want those compliments to be spread out, express and share that.

8. They know that orgasming is the ultimate way to show how much they love and enjoy having sex with you, so they put all of their effort into making sure that happens when they are about to cum.

9. They’re simply more comfortable expressing themselves sexually when they’re in the moment of pure ecstasy and pleasure that comes with orgasm—otherwise, they feel shy or inhibited.

There are lots of different reasons why your partner might only be vocal during orgasm—and none of them necessarily mean that there’s anything wrong with you or your sex life! The next time you’re curious about why your partner behaves a certain way during sex, just ask them—you might be surprised by their answer (and learn a lot about what gets him off in the process).

Have you ever asked your partner about their sexual behaviour? What answer did you get? Share in the comments and don’t get to react to this post with an emoji!

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